Ugh! Another Birthday.

So old and ancient.

Alien.

Ash is a goddamn plaster cast head with medical catheters in his neck. It's true.

Martian Up Woman And Grow A Third Breast!

I don't think this insult is going to be very successful.

Damn You Puberty, It's All Your Fault.

"Man Up and Grow a Set of Balls" and "Grab yourself by the Balls". I hear these lovely lady like expressions used a lot on talk shows and in reality television series and it got me wondering...

Are there shops out there where you can go to order a new set of balls and they will grow them for you? What is the incubation time for a fully grown set of balls? Do they cocoon your old set of balls in chrysalis for 9-15 days before a bright new set of grown balls emerge? Do I have to wait for my Milk Balls to drop out before my Adult Man Balls grow in?

What's with this manning up thing too? Is it like Powering Up in a video game? Are there cheat codes for the Manning Up Maneuver?

As for gabbing yourself by the Balls... what kind of resistance is met when one part of your physical anatomy grabs another? Is there a state of motion involved; is inertia attained? What kind of velocities are involved here? It could be dangerous to do this. Is it like when Thor throws his hammer and holds onto it and he goes flying off with it?

We all know Women are full on "Woman Upping" all the time so there is no need to ask that question of the opposite sex because they're awesome, but are they capable of growing new sets of body parts too? Could they like, grow a third breast like that chick in Total Recall?